Monday, April 30, 2012

When Trainer Barb Means Business

This is the internal exchange that happens whenever my do-gooder conscience, which I refer to as Trainer Barb, makes me come to grips with my life and confronts my love of ice cream with a no-nonsense attitude.































































*I wish I were making this up.




























She may be a tough cookie, but Trainer Barb knows what she's talking about. I should have listened to her several years ago. And trust me when I say that I won't even think about getting ice cream, no matter how much it makes my taste buds tingle with desire.

Barb the (Blubber Butt) French Bean

31 comments:

  1. HAHA I loved it!! Great work :) I say this as I eat a bowl of ice cream. I think I need a trainer too! I think I need my own personal Trainer Cerena.

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  2. Shakira used to have curves. I saw her perform when she was just 19.
    Just do what I do. Switch to soy ice cream and pretend it's healthy.

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  3. As someone who's in a serious effort to lose a whole lot of weight, I can say this. EAT THE ICE CREAM. There's nothing wrong with having a bit of it, and diets suck. Exercise is way more important. Plus I can't eat ice cream, so I need other people to eat it for me. Also your gym has to be the most evil gym in existence. I hope the fast food joints were built around it, and not that they saw a whole bunch of fast food and thought "This is the perfect place for a gym." Sadly it is. You get all those people leaving the gym with a sense of shame about eating fast food and wanting to work it off, and then they see the gym. It's genius really.

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  4. HA Ha HA TOO funny! I'll pay Trainer Barb to come over and whip my butt into shape. (Will she take payment in ice cream?)

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  5. You could give all the ice cream to me :D

    Brilliantly funny told (and drawn) story :)

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  6. Holy cow! I'm ever so massively turned on by Trainer Barb. With her curious mix of well-meaningness and toughlove, she's practically the love child of my ex and my mom. I feel dirty and freshly-scrubbed clean at the same time, if you know what I mean.

    *Hello, Darkness, my old friend..*

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  7. hahah wow, I think I need Trainer Barb in my life!

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  8. I have to agree with Mark, don't shut yourself off from ice cream entirely. You'll be more likely to crash. Just have a small amount as a treat very infrequently. This is coming from Mr. Workout Nut 3000.

    See, the cool thing about calories is you can burn them off. You want your stomach to high five a juicy burger (best picture ever, btw)? Then just run until your legs fall off. Fair trade off, right? You don't NEED legs...

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  9. At first, I thought the drawing of trainer Barb was going to be the funniest picture on here. Then you went and made a pic of your stomach high-fiving a burger, and you just won best picture on the internetz of the day. Seriously, that is the best.

    I eat about 1/2 cup of ice cream twice a week. It keeps me from eating a whole pint at once. :)

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  10. I laughed out loud at that Cold Stone Creamery picture. Forunately for me, I'm not a huge ice cream fan. Unfortunately, I have no problem getting fat off other junk.

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  11. Hello there, this is my first time to your blog - and I love this post. However, I have to disagree with Mark and ABFTS guys... don't eat the ice cream! lol... well, that's my technique anyway. I've lost a lot of weight now and it's mainly been through dieting. I'm almost home free! Can't wait.

    Anyway, I came by to thank you for stopping by my blog and commenting. I really really appreciate it! Everyone has been so nice about helping me out with this little project! So, again, thanks!

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  12. I agree with the Mark and Beer. A little ice cream once in a while doesn't hurt. And the idea that it's just fat and calories is laughable.

    Ice cream is made from milk, which has Vitamin C, protein, and calcium, WHICH YOU NEED. You have to keep your bones strong or you'll be one of those little old ladies who's afraid to get out of bed in the morning because their bones might break. And you need the protein in order to build muscle, which in turn helps burn more calories. So there you go. You just need to remember, everything in moderation. Don't eat a whole carton in one sitting, that's all.

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  13. See...if I were you I'd have eaten the ice cream waaaaaaaay before Trainer Barb appeared! x

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  14. OMG i laughed so hard...it was like talking to myself!

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  15. just joined your hilarious site/blog!!! finally a weight loss blog combo with cartoon humor = LOVE IT!!!

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  16. Oh Barb, I can so relate to this post. I consider Ben & Jerry my dealers, and my drug of choice to be Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup ice cream. Can't tell you how many times I've gone into a feeding frenzy and eaten every last bite of that container, in one sitting! I absolutely loved every one of the captions /cartoons here. Too funny.

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  17. Hahahahahahahaaa... "I gave your face a high-five to welcome you to the present"? Loved it! Freakin' hilarious, every single cartoon here. Thanks for the motivation :D

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  18. One of the gyms near me has a McDonalds AND a KFC in front of it. I'd never be able to resist the temptation if I went there!

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  19. Funny. I love that burger high fiving ( is that a word) your stomach. BUT seriously, I'm with everyone else on the picture and the ice cream. EAT IT. Only eat a little bit of it and then hit the workout trail.

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  20. i've been having the same trouble with beer. Except my trainer likes beers just as much as i do.....the beers usually win.

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  21. You mad genius!! I need trainer Barb!!

    Love your drawings :)

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  22. Hilarious! That's good that you have a Trainer Barb to keep you on the right track. But seriously, that ice cream is ALL YOURS and don't share with anyone, even Trainer Barb!

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  23. Ima too sensitive. This made me cry. I know exactly who Barb (the bubble butt) French Bean is & I know exactly who Trainer Barb is. It's a horrifying and real scenario. I have real compassion for both Barbs. I didn't make matters worse by going to my own freezer and drowning my reading trauma in ice cream. A certain almost bubble butt daughter and a lithe can eat all he wants grandson ate it all. Good thing they did too, it's only wee gracious tribute to you that I refrained. Hugzz ya need hugzz. Have a wonderful week.

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  24. Haha! I kinda just died of laughter reading this...mostly because I can relate... Trainer Barb needs to come yell at me to exercise more, ha. I also have a weakness for ice cream, or anything sweet really. Love the stomach high-fiving the burger...lol! I think I needed to read this post today. I lost 70 pounds so far this year and now I seem to be a bit stuck, haven't been able to lose anymore recently. Probably because I haven't been exercising as much and the end of this semester of college consumed my life. I'm done now though...need to get back on the bandwagon! :)

    Principessa Gabriella

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  25. Yep That seems to be my situation too -_- but that sucks that you are surrounded by all things fast food...

    -Hanny

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  26. OMG, I love this. Especially the part about giving her face a high-five. Awesome post!!!!!!!!

    best,
    MOV

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  27. LOL! LOVED the stomach/burger drawing, Barb. Too funny! And the slap upside the head drawing too. Really fabulous post.

    As a card-carrying professional dieter, I'm afraid I can relate with this scenario far too well. The only difference is that Trainer Susan is an absolute wimp compared to Trainer Barb. :D

    --Susan

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  28. I love your drawings and your twisted humor which tastes even better with sprinkles!

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  29. I deffo killed Trainer Amelia a long time ago, the trick is to drown her via copious amounts of ice cream, win win.

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Apparently, leaving comments on this blog is a hit-or-miss game of Russian roulette: you are either lucky and can comment away, or you are required to log in when the settings are CLEARLY set to allow trouble-free commenting (sorry 'bout that, folks). If anything, the Facebook page is always a viable option. :) -Barb